Another Holi came and just went by.... just like that. And as usual I got up at 11:30 AM - had my breakfast and went on with my day.
What's the big deal with this festival - I mean is it even a festival? More of a public nuisance actually! Any random stranger can put chemicals fit to cause skin cancer and shout "Bura na maano holi hai!" and expect to get away with it!
Bloody bugger, buraa kaise na manein, you've ruined my clothes and I'll have to spend an hour in the bathroom trying to scrub off this dye that you've poured on my face - and the sweeper will have to scrub the bathroom to get rid of the spots of green, blue and fuschia the next morning... And you want me not to feel buraa about it! Screw you asshole!
And the stupid brats poised precariously on their balconies with those balloons full of colour. Ready to hit any passer by from high above and shout "Holi hai" - bloody assholes. Get a life man!
All that is avoidable. I mean if you get up at noon - the holi mania is almost over and everybody's mom is shouting "Rahul andar aa jao ab - nahin to paani chala jaayega". And the city's water consumption goes up to triple the average consumption and the harmful chemicals in the the wastewater go up by about the same amount.
So basically you can very easily save youself from the (un)holi ordeal - but no one - abso-fucking-lutely no one can save himself (or herself, to please all those feminists) - from the ordeal that takes place on all the freaking chauraahas of the country.
Every freaking chauraaha (crossroad) that you might conceive of, will have a freaking ton of freshly cut wood to burn. "Bhai Holika jalaayenge" Well, it's okay if one god damn Holikaa is burnt in one locality/colony - but it's more like every bloody house has to burn its own freaking Holikaa right on the road in front of it.
It's infuriating! (New word - checked out in the dictionary :-D ) It's bloody annoying! So much wood wasted - for baking stupid chana & ganna.
It should be banned!! And that much of wood left burning overnight screws up the spot on the road where its burnt. The next morning - BANG - there's a big pothole there right in the midddle of the road - thanks to the Holika that was burnt the last night. Who the fuck needs corrupt government official to screw this country. We're doing it ourselves!
Why can't people realize that when they're cutting trees - it's not their own bloody property that they're cutting - it's public property. It's a tree that someone planted 30-35 years ago - that you're cutting. When you plant your own tree - you can cut it after 35 years and bloody burn your Holikaa for 35 more days - I don't fucking care.
But don't you burn Holikaa on every fucking chaurahaa of the city from the very few trees that are left. We can't afford to lose the precious few trees, we can't afford to have the added pollution and we can't fucking afford to have more potholes on the roads!!
Monday, March 28, 2005
Wednesday, March 09, 2005
Fuck Bill
That's what you feel like doing when two days before the mid sem you spend the whole night watching movies back to back... and not just brainless hindi flicks - you've been watching a Quentin Tarantino film. Two actually - 'cuz they're so damn different you don't know whether you should call the other a sequel.
Yes - I'm talking of the two masterpieces - Kill Bill Vol 1 & 2. Two word review - Fucking Awesome!!
The first scene hit my eyes at precisely 1:10 AM, 9th March 2005 and 5 hours 50 mins later, with the approx 4 hours and two volumes behind me, an hour spend on IMDB fooling around on discussion forums, 30 mins reviewing the awesome scenes and another 20 spent going to take a leak (quite a few leaks actually) - I realized I had screwed Mid Sem II as well!
It's 2:02 PM, 9th March 2005 and with just a day left for the mid sems I am actually listening to the Kill Bill Vol 1 sound track and posting this on my blog!
Fuck man - I must really have gone insane.
Volume I - is full of action - the Kung Fu variety. I remember my brother watching the Friday Fury films on Star Movies every week. Those crappy dubbed Chinese/Jap movies with flying monks and monkey, tiger, crane, dog, bitch, skunk, what-the-goddamn-fuck style of martial arts. And I used to have my weekly ritual of mock puking. But no, not this time. Kill Bill Volume I is one bloody, ghory, martial-arty movie that I've fallen in instant love with.
From the first scene till the last - you're glued to your seat. Tarantino has perfected the art of telling a story and building characters. When The Bride/Black Mamba (Uma Thurman) screams bloody revenge - you want to scream with her, when she cries in pain you want to cry with her, and when she sliced that arm off Sophie - you well, stare in horror! Oh, and then you wonder - does blood really spurt out like a fountain!
I think I'll never find out - anyone want to enlighten me on this.
Where Volume I is fast paced, Volume II is a drawn out with a slower pace and more dialogue. With more emotions other than that of anger and revenge. There's hatred, contempt, and love. Oh well, not to forget the emotion you get when you see an eyeball being squashed by bare foot :-). I can't get a precise word for it!
Tarantino keeps up with the mixed chronological sequence of story-telling (aka Pulp Fiction) - which makes the plot even more interesting.
What's the plot - The Bride (Uma Thurman) wants to take revenge from the Deadly Viper Assassin Group (or something like that) - for screwing her over real bad on her wedding (rehearsal) day. And in particular she wants to Kill Bill!
And I want to Fuck Bill - for fucking up my mid sems.
And while I'm at it - throw in Gates as well :-p
Yes - I'm talking of the two masterpieces - Kill Bill Vol 1 & 2. Two word review - Fucking Awesome!!
The first scene hit my eyes at precisely 1:10 AM, 9th March 2005 and 5 hours 50 mins later, with the approx 4 hours and two volumes behind me, an hour spend on IMDB fooling around on discussion forums, 30 mins reviewing the awesome scenes and another 20 spent going to take a leak (quite a few leaks actually) - I realized I had screwed Mid Sem II as well!
It's 2:02 PM, 9th March 2005 and with just a day left for the mid sems I am actually listening to the Kill Bill Vol 1 sound track and posting this on my blog!
Fuck man - I must really have gone insane.
Volume I - is full of action - the Kung Fu variety. I remember my brother watching the Friday Fury films on Star Movies every week. Those crappy dubbed Chinese/Jap movies with flying monks and monkey, tiger, crane, dog, bitch, skunk, what-the-goddamn-fuck style of martial arts. And I used to have my weekly ritual of mock puking. But no, not this time. Kill Bill Volume I is one bloody, ghory, martial-arty movie that I've fallen in instant love with.
From the first scene till the last - you're glued to your seat. Tarantino has perfected the art of telling a story and building characters. When The Bride/Black Mamba (Uma Thurman) screams bloody revenge - you want to scream with her, when she cries in pain you want to cry with her, and when she sliced that arm off Sophie - you well, stare in horror! Oh, and then you wonder - does blood really spurt out like a fountain!
I think I'll never find out - anyone want to enlighten me on this.
Where Volume I is fast paced, Volume II is a drawn out with a slower pace and more dialogue. With more emotions other than that of anger and revenge. There's hatred, contempt, and love. Oh well, not to forget the emotion you get when you see an eyeball being squashed by bare foot :-). I can't get a precise word for it!
Tarantino keeps up with the mixed chronological sequence of story-telling (aka Pulp Fiction) - which makes the plot even more interesting.
What's the plot - The Bride (Uma Thurman) wants to take revenge from the Deadly Viper Assassin Group (or something like that) - for screwing her over real bad on her wedding (rehearsal) day. And in particular she wants to Kill Bill!
And I want to Fuck Bill - for fucking up my mid sems.
And while I'm at it - throw in Gates as well :-p
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