Okay, now after about 30-40 mins of furious debate with an RSS/BJP/VHP/Bajrang Dal hardliner if you're still in your senses and have not fainted due to the sheer incomprehensibilty of simple logic exhibited by an otherwise sane person (oooh - that was a Looong phrase), I'm sure the conversation would shape up something like this:
RSS: The problem is that we Hindus are too tolerant. Now enough is enough. We have to reply back. We have to fight back!
You: Tolerant? Tolerant to what?
RSS: To Muslim atrocities!
You: What? Has any Muslim ever done anything to you?
RSS: Ha! Don't forget history. Those who say that we should forget the history and look towards the future are condemned to repeat it. [Ed: Oh btw, this is an oft repeated statement. To save you from the sheer boredom of reading it again and again just try to think that I wrote this out, say, about 10 times in this convesation :-)]
You: Okay, so tell me the History Mr. Historian, what have - you a PhD in Indian history or something? [Ed: Uh-oh! Wrong question - now you're DOOMED!]
RSS: Gandhi was a bloody chutiya. He was anti-Hindu and always appeased Muslims. He supported the Khilafat movement which had nothing to do with the Indian freedom movement. He supported the Muslim League. And look what they did in the end. They wanted Pakistan. Gandhi and Nehru both agreed. The bloody muslim bastards. If we dont act they will take away all our land...
You: Whoa, whoa whoa! Calm down buddy! One issue at a time. Okay, so Muslims demanded Pakistan. Those were the Muslims 50 years back!! Are they here now?
RSS: Yes! These Indian muslims - jis thaali mein khaate hain, usi thaali mein chhed karte hain - whenever India loses a match against Pakistan they burst crackers. Muslims are anti-nationals. They are anti-Hindu.
You: Dude! I said ONE ISSUE AT A TIME! Being a hindu and being a nationalist is not the same thing. But that comes later. First of all - have you seen any Muslim bursting crackers?
RSS: Er..... um..... my friend lives near a muslim dominated area and he told me that he heard some crackers being burst in the recent India-Pakistan match. And I'm pretty sure that he won't lie to me. [Okay. If the guy is balls enough he might say that he had seen muslims bursting crackers himself]
You: Okay! Is that a friend from your good ol' neighbourhood RSS shaakha?
RSS: Yes! He is Shri Tanveer Pogadia. He is a noble man. He does a lot of social work, infact he even went to so-and-so relief camp in some far-flung area of the country on his own money....
[Let me add, the guy actually might say, that he himself has seen the crackers bursting, and then you wouldn't be able to say much. I too have heard these rumours (RUMOURS - if you missed it the last time)]
You: Great! Just my point. Believe that Pogadia guy and do what he says. Exaclty what he wants.
RSS: No! The muslims have been doing that to Hindus for centuries. Ab Hindu samaaj ko jaagna hai! We must unite. We must answer back. Ab bahut ho chuka Enough is enough.
You: Owwwwkay! So, for some atrocities and political moves taken by muslims centuries ago you'll crucify the muslims living in India, today! Great logic buddy! Tell that Pogadia guy that his speeches really work! Idiots like you stop thinking when they listen to him!
RSS: Blah, blooh, bleeh, blah [Ed: You can safely switch your ears off. Nothing even remotely sensible from this point onwards]
Quoting from another of many RSS propaganda texts going around:
We have lost Afghanistan (for your kind information it was a part of India), we have lost Lahore, we have lost Bangladesh, we have lost our Sindhu river, Kashmir is having big questions mark and let me say that we have lost it as well because Hindus have been thrown out of Kashmir. Now what we are going to loose next?
Where they get this notion that Afghanistan was part of India (with reference to whatever that word meant centuries ago), I fail to comprehend. Check out Wikipedia for the history - and let me know if you find something to that tune.
The second thing is, the Hindutva brigade says that Muslims are anti-nationals and that they dont belong here. Then they say that we (India - the Hindu nation, which they proclaim it to be) - are losing Muslim dominated land, like Pakistan, Bangladesh, Kashmir, etc. Dudes! Stick to one stand. Either we are NOT a Hindu nation OR Muslim dominated land does not belong to us! You cannot have your cake and eat it too!
And puhleeeaase, spare us the long drawn sermons on your twisted Indian history. It puts us in a state of historia ;-)
Author:- Vinay Khaitan
ReplyDelete[disclaimer:- I am not part of RSS, neither anti-muslim, anti-christian. I am just a rational hindu living happily my own life. But here the amusing blog forces me to take strong RSS and anti-muslim approach.]
RSS: So you got everything to say what you wanted?
You: ummm...no. But ok...you say now.
RSS: Me lord, can I ask some question to the judge too?
You: Yeah, why not? Sure. I have enough knowledge of RSS/indian history to tackle every question!!!
RSS: Hmmm....I understand your points! Muslims as a follower of islam are very nice persons! We have done severe mistakes in vomiting poisons againts muslims,yeah? Actually, there are some criminal elements everywhere maliging the communities, we should be wary of that, right?
You: Yes , yes! That's what I always wanted to point out! You got it!
RSS: Okay, have you ever came to our branches?
You: khamosh(shatrugh style)! Do you want me to join al-qaeda? Heh, leave me buddy(what a contrast!).
RSS: And you are getting all the view about poisons against muslims without even going to the spot? Is it the way, any investigation is done?
You: Ummmm....no! But at least, for god sake, don't ask me to come to your branches.
RSS: Okay...can you send some person with less hatred to our branch?
You: yeah..that is possible...(confusingly nodding).
RSS: Okay...then testify what I am saying with what your own person sees. We do everythings for your own mental/physical health. Then we have some discussion sessions. There we have always sung one song. None of them says anything against muslim community as whole. We have always glorified our past and nation only. You know, what definition we take of hindu, when people ask? Everyone who understand the land of Hindusthan their own land, is hindu! We welcomes every muslim coming here!
That's what we teach every one. Our most precious anthem only glorifies our nation, no community hatred is ever spread.
If you ever found such things, ban our organisation!
You: Hehe! You don't spread hatred? Joking? And then, chori aur seena jori? Demanding for ban? OKAY! took your challenge. We are going to ban RSS.
RSS: Hehehehe! You have banned us three times, remember? They always got lifted by courts.
You: ummm..okay. But then actually, we thought that let them run some religious organisation.
RSS: Do you forget, why you lost the case? You lost the case, because we proved in "bahri panchat"(the latest ban) that we are nationalist. And we are never against any communities in our own works too.
Don't make excuses!
You: (slightly angry) These courts are bastards. They never do right things.
RSS: [very loud laugh] Khisyani billi khambha noche! Let me see, what you find out!
You: Don't do stupid sarcasms. I am not going to tolerate it.
RSS: Okay Okay...calm down....let us go towards another topic raised by you.
You: Hmmm, that's better!
.....continued........
.........continued...........
ReplyDeleteRSS: So what you knows about atrocities commited by muslims in general? What they say about violence?
You: Hey! I am almost like a historian, although I never read history. But let me ask, why you people always rant about knowledge of history without having a single bit of history knowledge?
RSS: Actually, we think that We have read some books of history. Don't know if they convey the correct history. You yourself decide. OK, we do think, that muslims in general have some critical problems with their community as a whole. We don't say that muslims are bad. But we do say, come out of fundamentalism. Leave araban roots, and be totally indian.
You: what evidence you have?
RSS: The evidence is quran. The epitome of their religious faith. It directly talks about killing of non-believers of islam. Either convert them, or they have to submit to us or be killed. You can see http://www.faithfreedom.org
That is the point where jehadi mentality is born. Jehad is the root os islam, the cause of all problems. Hazrat did these things in their whole life. From starting of 643 AD he fought 8 big wars and many small wars, and created a huge political mileage in the name of religion. Womens are abducted and you must be knowing what is done. That is all history. Read hadis for this.
You: bastard! You know, what you are saying? Religion such dirty? Impossible. Get your head checked first. Some screw needs to be tightened. That site must have been made by a RSS propagandist.
RSS: That is made by an atheist who was earlier a musalman :)
You: Don't speak in public like this. Your head would be crushed by fatwah!
RSS: Exactly! We know it. But never issued fatwah against any person ever, niether we tolerat it...
You: Sorry, just tongue slipped. So you have only to accuse islam na. Why are you against muslims? They are living peacefully with us? They are not doing any jehad with us.
RSS: Exactly that's why we are not against muslims community. They just need to come out or urban root of islam, that's it! But let me ask, has this happened? If not, then wouldn't we need to keep a check upon history.
You: haaaa! Now you are coming to history of muslim atrocities. Sure, tell me , how much do you know about it?
RSS: So when they came to india? remember? Almost around 1100. Perhaps Ghaznavi. What they all did? You remember?
You: I know they were like robbers. They just did some robberies and gone.
RSS: Ever heard of Ghazi title? Gazi tamur and many others? Do you know when it was give to attackers? It was given when they slash some definite amount of heads. BTW, that was from islamic roots.
You: There is surely some misinformation.
RSS: surely, check it out. Also check out babarnama etc. They would help you to know more about history :). The atrocities of sultanat leaders and mughals.
.........continued.........
RSS: Although this point is next after negligible. But as you pointed out...let me tell you. You neve seen fireworks from muslim muhallas when pakistan won the match?
ReplyDeleteYou: Nopes!
RSS: Me neither. And as you suggested, my friends have seen it.
You: Yooooo! That is the point. Always everyone's friend sees it, never you yourself! He too was from RSS, isn't it.
RSS: sorry to disappoint it. He was too "secular" in his view. But whenver asked about this point, he bacame silent. Because he himslef accepted it being seen :)
You: You are being either too personal or lieing. One man and personal experience can't judge a community.
RSS: Exactly! That is why I wrote "next to negligible". Dude, you know, you even don't know our points. What to say then? first find out what we say, then come back after having a breath :) I hope you must have got enough dose till now. muslims were 4 crore at the time of division and hindu 36. What is the statistics now? ;-) Just a lighter side.
He he, just the very next argument that every pro-Hindu, anit-Musli, self-proclaiming nationalist comes to! I'll get to these issues in my next post - my series is not over yet.
ReplyDeleteAs for what happens in the RSS shaakhas, was rather clear from the two movies that we saw - communal rot and propaganda being pushed slowly and subtly.
Some might say basing all you perception from two movies (which were probably made by anti-RSS folk) is sheer stupidity. And I would say that absolutely NO pro-RSS person sitting in the audience objected to the truth of what had been shown. All of them were saying - "So what? Why dont you show some movie on SIMI or Al-Qaeda? Why always RSS and VHP?!"
Wait for my next post. More episodes coming up!
Author:- Vinay Khaitan
ReplyDeleteMy "blog" too is not over dude. Next one would be on your "jumping" point. They have commited so much of atrocities in history, so why do you want to take revenge today ?
[Avishek] That's exactly my point. Instead of drousing the communal fire the Hindutva brigade adds more fuel to it.
ReplyDeleteNanda: That's exactly why am I not RSS-man. I have problems with RSS thinking/action pattern. What they are doing is never going to help country. But I never had problems with their ideology (well, almost). But I would keep my stance here at least totally RSSian. You should understand that most of the RSS-person (whom you talked with, as you said) are totally unaware of the reasons and just have been swayed off by RSS arguments. So, they don't stand a chance to win in front of you (as you both are at same ground and at the same ground "equality" notion is the best). The importance is to realize that you need to keep check upon every religion which has their roots in hatred/violence. Just think, why every other muslim country is islamic country and minorities are brutally...... . Bangladesh mein hi dekh lo yar, jise bharat ne azad karaya tha. baki ki to chhoro.
ReplyDeleteGood to see that you are back blogging and that too on some seemingly serious issues! =)
ReplyDeleteDo check your Orkut scrap as well...
~Saurabh Mehta
Saurabh, while caricaturing your opponents is always fun, you may find it an interesting excercise to figure out why people find RSS/Hindutva "propoganda" so appealing.
ReplyDeleteHmmm, atrocities by hindu kings !! So let me give you a link which gives you some idea of sources of these facts.....
ReplyDeletehttp://koenraadelst.voiceofdharma.com/articles/ayodhya/pushyamitra.html
(Go only by facts)
Can you say after reading it that bauddhs were actually cruel because askhok did that because of his respect for buddha ? No. You must differetiate between a religion and its followers. Followers may be wrong even when the religion is good.
But in case of islam, this is exactly opposite. There hatred is started by its starter, muhammad. So if you go exactly by quran, then osama bin laden is a respected person ! So in case of islam, the problem is its root. in case of indian religions, the problem is inner evils of followers.
Just one observation.
ReplyDeleteThe RSS part is also being played by the anti-RSS guy, so the article is far from being unbiased.
Was just an observation, no comments, and I am not 'taking sides' either.